Bushwick Bill's Guide to Crashing

Editor's note: Bushwick Bill is a founding member of The Geto Boys, and an avid Cycopaths reader. Today he joins us as guest editor.

The number one rule to avoid crashing: buy ten at a time.

Truly, only when crashing do you realize how good it feels to be a gangster.

It is not all fun and games. Crashes can be serious, too. The crash above put paid to Iban's 2004 Tour ambitions. Except for the time when my girl shot me in the eye, this was the saddest day of my life.

Back in the day guys would purposely crash in training. Why? To do shit like this on race day.

Don't nap until after the final sprint. Otherwise, you may wake up with a headache.

Don't race track. Ever. That's for crazy people. Heard of the Match Sprint? That's where you and your opponent take a dive on the last lap and run to the line.

Again, don't race track. See the Russian above? With the wheel on his stomach? He stood up, giggled, and said he just wanted to put on a show for the fans.

When you hit the ground, don't go knee first. That ends careers. Right, Roberto?

Relax, it happens to everybody! Even Olympic Champions cry sometimes, and not even the best doping regimen can protect you.

Lance crashed and ULE FUCKING WAITED.

By all means: do not ride a Trek.

It's not all bad. Sometimes crashing leads to tender moments between teammates.