Hoste, Boonen lose Flanders

Bonus Schadenfreude Edition!

Leif could use a hug.

The Tour of Flanders lived up to its hype today, and I say this sincerely and without snark: what a beautiful race it was!

Alessandro Ballan has arrived. His attack on the Muur of Geraardsbergen shelled Boonen so completely that the Belgian was not seen for the rest of the race. He went on to finish out of the top ten.
The only rider able to follow the wiry Italian was last year's runner up, Leif Hoste. They worked well together and the duo made to the finish ten seconds ahead of the chase group.
Wisely, Hoste got on Ballan's wheel and forced the Italian to lead out the final kilometre. It looked like curtains for Alessanro's chances. At 150 metres, Hoste opened up his sprint on Ballan's left, thinking he had enough to hold it to the line. But Ballan managed to summon a fraction more strength and came around Hoste in the final ten metres to steal the glory. Hoste committed cycling's unenviable act of premature ejaculation: he started his sprint too early.

The last kilometre was crazy," said Ballan upon winning "I still don't believe that I did it!"

And neither could Hoste.

A Belgian TV crew approached him moments before the podium presentation, and poor Leif just about broke down crying. He was a shattered man.
Mr 60 almost felt sorry for him. He looked like a little boy blaming himself for his his parent's divorce. We wanted to give him a vanilla cupcake, a hug, and remind him that he did his best.

See? Mr 60 does have something that could pass for a heart.

As soon as we saw him climb onto the podium, though, our potential sympathy was gone. Leif was anything but graceful in defeat. He didn't even bother to hold up his bouquet of flowers. Suddenly, we found ourselves thinking: ha ha.

We recommend reading this before Roubaix.

I'd be disappointed too if I looked like Lou Reed.